Researchers estimate that about eight million couples are non-monogamous. Should you and your partner join them? Here, the pro and cons of extending your twosome.
Pro: You get to try something new. Been wanting to see what’s beneath those gray sweats on that new dude at the gym? Now is your chance.
Con: He gets to try something new. Of course, that means he also gets to try something new. You’ll have to be willing to accept that the door swings both ways.
Pro: You can get your needs met. It can be unrealistic to expect one person to attend to your every need for the rest of your life. If bae’s stroke game is fantastic but he’s lacking in the head department, this could be your chance to get your oral fix.
Con: Jealousy is a green-eyed “Becky with the good hair.” That is, it’s a b***h. When faced with the real prospect of him spending time with another woman, you might realize you truly are not built to share.
Pro: You could strengthen your bond. It might seem counterintuitive, but the amount of honesty and vulnerability it takes to have adult conversations about such a fraught topic could bring you closer together in unexpected ways.
Con: You might reveal cracks in your foundation. There’s nothing like stress to reveal the tiny cracks and imperfections in your relationship. Opening things up could bring hidden resentments to the forefront.
Pro: You have more options. If your attractions cross gender lines, an open situation keeps you from being stuck with just one type of person.
Con: One of you could fall in love. Outside your relationship, that is. It can be hard to separate feelings and sex, and one of you could potentially find deeper intimacy with someone else. Are you prepared to walk away?