How we construct our identities and express ourselves to others is deeply personal. One aspect of this expression is which pronouns we choose to represent our gender identity. With the increased visibility of more and more people opting for gender-neutral pronouns, the issue is making its way to the forefront. And it’s worth learning why.
Throughout history, pronouns have adapted to the times. In fact, “they” wasn’t always singular. In the 1600s, medical texts referred to individuals who didn’t fit the binary gender standards as they/them. But by the 18th century, the idea that a singular “they” was grammatically incorrect became popular amongst linguists. Interestingly, “they” isn’t the only gender-neutral pronoun that has been introduced over the years. Scholars and writers have proposed everything from hir and ze to thon but none have really stuck—until now.
According to Senior Director of Policy and Advocacy Operations of the AIDS Foundation Chicago Kim Hunt, embracing a mindset of mutual respect and understanding for one’s individual pronouns and the pronouns of others is an important step towards accepting all identities. But in order to move in this direction, it’s important to first understand the different pronouns and how they’re used.
The gender binary pronouns of “she/her/hers” for women and “he/him/his” for men are used to refer to people who identify within the gender binary. However, not everyone identifies within this binary because it may be limiting to their gender expression.
Those who choose to identify outside of the gender binary often feel that their self-expression is better supported by language and pronouns that are more inclusive. “There is a growing recognition that there is a gender continuum rather than a binary, but it is still a big hurdle for a lot of folks to deal with because society is so structured around the binary. So many things still have to be unlearned,” Hunt explains.
The main gender-neutral pronouns are the more widely used “they/them/theirs,” but other gender neutral pronouns include the “ze/zir/zirs”, “xe/xem/xirs”, and “sie/hir/hirs”. These pronouns are available for those who do not confine their gender identity into the gender binary or who challenge the existing gender norms by finding expression in pronouns that are not gendered.
For example, Hunt explains: “Even if you perceive someone as a cisgender female, that may not be how they identify. It is important to use the words that are important to the person who is in front of you. Making assumptions about a person’s identity is not good in any place.”
Not sure how to ask someone what their pronouns are? If you’re comfortable, just share yours. It signals to the other person that you want to know (and care about!) what their pronouns are. And if you get it wrong and someone corrects you, just apologize, correct yourself and move on with the conversation. The key is to make the person feel safe, accepted and respected.
Sponsored by MOSAICO
MOSAICO is a large study that will try to prove whether the experimental vaccine regimen can prevent HIV infection in North America, Latin America and Europe. To do this, the study will enroll cisgender men and transgender persons who have sex with cisgender men and/or transgender persons. If Mosaico can show that the study vaccine regimen works, it will be a very important step on the way to finding a safe and effective vaccine for the prevention of HIV. To learn more about MOSAICO and if you are eligible visit www.mosaicostudy.com/contact.
